Tasha Blasi believes that the first step to having a family is telling yourself it’s possible. You might not know how or when it will happen, especially if you are struggling with infertility issues, but she feels that believing that you can be a parent and being open to family-building options is critical. In her case, it took her ten IVF rounds (eight rounds apart) to have her two wonderful children with her husband.
We talked to Tasha about how she has now become a fertility consultant and patient advocate, helping people navigate fertility decisions, work on self care, and to let go of what they can’t control.
Q: What’s your fertility/infertility story in a nutshell?
I went through ten rounds of IVF at four different clinics. I have two children from those ten rounds. My son was round two and my daughter was round ten. Our initial reason for IVF was my husband’s low sperm count, but when we continued to have trouble with IVF, I kept trying to figure out what was wrong with me, too.
Try to understand the things that you can control and the things that you can’t. For the things that you can’t control, fully give them away to someone else to handle.
Q: What advice do you give to someone who is just starting her fertility journey, who is perhaps feeling overwhelmed?
Try to understand the things that you can control and the things that you can’t. For the things that you can’t control, fully give them away to someone else to handle. Most women make the mistake of putting their energy into trying to control something that is not possible to control. This energy could be going towards creating her best self and the family of her dreams instead.
Q: What are some of the misconceptions that you see about infertility?
There are so many. The biggest is that it is the woman’s fault. (Editor’s note: We know that over 30% of cases are due to male factor infertility.)
In some cases, a clinic prolongs a woman’s fertility journey. Sometimes, instead of the clinic admitting that they can’t get the job done, they recommend that the woman start over with them but use an egg donor.
Knowing that you will be a mom, but you just don’t know exactly when… is the first step to unconditionally loving your child.
Q: Is there anything else you want to add?
You will be a mom because that is a choice that you get to make. When and how your child shows up is not something that you can control. Knowing that you will be a mom, but you just don’t know exactly when, and you are OK with your child having a say as to how he/she shows up is the first step to unconditionally loving your child.